Jake asked me a few days ago if I was
only going to blog about the girls. I
responded quickly saying, “Well, I feel like my life didn’t have much meaning
before them!” I spoke too quickly
and realized that of course my life had meaning before they arrived…just a
different meaning. It sent me back in
time…almost 9 years ago when Jake and I met. As a freshman in college, I was
wild, carefree, and looking for love in all the wrong places! When this smart aleck, great looking guy Jake
walked in to my life I had no idea where he would be taking me in this crazy
journey called life. Thank goodness he hung on to me, because I could not
imagine ever finding anyone I love more than him. His genuine personality, kind heart, sarcasm,
and incredible looks make him stand apart from all other men, in my opinion. J
Jake is a man a few words, and the
hardest worker you will ever meet. I
taught 1st grade in Ellis for two years, and in the evenings,
breaks, and summers I would help him. We
planted cover crops, fall crops, spring crops, harvested more crops,
raked/baled, and hauled in bales together.
This could quite possibly drive some couples crazy being together so
much. I relished every minute. I loved
helping, and even more so loved our long conversations in the tractor, combine,
or semi together. It was here that we
talked of our future, dreamed of our future children, and planned our
vacations. It was here that we laughed
until we cried. It was here that Jake
would guide me through some of our most troubled days, and would hug me through
my tears. It was also here that made
some of the most important decisions of our life.
I know that most men yearn for that “biological”
child. This was not the case for
Jake. Of course, he would love a boy some day,
don’t all men want a son? When I first
brought up the topic of adoption with Jake, his response was simply, “How do we
start?” It was never a question of
whether it was right for us because our hearts are so deeply entwined that we
truly feel the same love and passion for all things that are dear to us!
Jake always tells me that I am too
impulsive and never let go of what I am passionate about. I will tell you, that once we started our
adoption process, we never looked back.
We were driven, driven with our need to have our child. One of the best compliments that Jake has
ever given me was over a year ago, before Bella was born. We were discussing when the time would be “right”
to get our names back out there and to begin searching for our new baby. I remember telling Jake that I have been
ready, but I’m waiting for you to be ready!
I’m trying to be patient because you have always said I am too impulsive
and too quick with decision making.
He replied, “Well, I’m ready now, because you are the one that pushed so
hard and fast with our first adoption process, and you brought us to Liberty…you
did a damn good job.” I remember tearing
up and my heart beating so hard and fast with love for this man that I’m
so blessed to call my husband.
Listen to your heart, those of you that
are questioning, wondering, and wishing.
Your heart is also your conscience…and your conscience is God’s way of
speaking to you. Follow that voice and
go in the direction it leads. We did,
and have never looked back.
“If it’s both terrifying and amazing…then
you definitely should pursue it..."
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